Remembering a great friend and mentor

As we celebrate another year around the sun, I have been reflecting on what matters to me most and, in particular, the important relationships and mentors in my life. I have been thinking a lot about my late friend and PTA associate, CeCe Phillips.

CeCe Phillips

CeCe and I were born the same year, just a few weeks apart. Our closeness in age felt like a special bond. I often joked with her about how she was older than me. She would always reply, “ Now Paul, you don’t want to go there!”

I thought I was her best friend…at least that is how she made me feel. She was so supportive and always made it clear that she truly cared about me. We talked on the phone, exchanged e-mails, saw each other at business meetings, met for lunch or coffee, and often co-taught classes together. Many years later, when she was too sick to travel because of cancer, I would visit her. At the celebration of her life after she passed, it was clear that she had been a best friend to so many. She loved all of us and had a gift for treating everyone in her life as someone special.

CeCe was a great listener, a quality so important in a friend and mentor. She was curious about me, my family, and my small business. Every time we were together she asked good questions and gave me the space to answer. When giving advice, she was careful to say just enough and not more.

Paul and CeCe back in the day

CeCe was also quick to share with me how I was a support to her. I remember giving her advice once about what she could say in a speech to a small business group. Though she didn’t end up using any of my exact suggestions, she told me afterwards, “What you shared with me was in there. Your ideas helped me think through what I wanted to say. Without talking to you first, I might not have ever gotten there on my own.”

In the last weeks of her life, I called her every couple of days and we would talk while I did errands and she sat in her chemotherapy treatment. We chatted about family, business colleagues, and what we wanted to do next. (We were always planning our next big idea or business venture together.) We laughed together and shared stories. She continued to mentor and inspire me with her passion for life, even as life was ebbing from her.

Of the many lessons I learned from this remarkable woman, three stand out:

• Listen closely and watch carefully when someone is talking to you.
• Do whatever you can to empower and provide support to all the people around you.
• If there is a choice between playing and working, always choose play.

It is hard to label many things in life as “perfect” but this may have been the perfect friendship. Thank you CeCe for being a wonderful friend, mentor and teacher.  You continue to inspire!