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mindfulness Archives | Paul Terry & Associates
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A Birthday Reflection

take a break

No matter what we do, we get older every year! Our birthdays remind us of this fact and we can’t ignore it. It’s my birthday weekend so thinking about change is particularly on my mind.

Early birthdays came with exciting milestones: being old enough to stay out late, attend a concert without parental supervision, borrow and drive the family car, and finally get to vote. Now that I’m at an age when I get carded for senior discounts and asked to join AARP, birthdays take on a different kind of significance. Who is speeding time up?

I think we should celebrate birthdays at every age. There are all kinds of ways to do that — throwing a party, going out to eat with friends, or just sleeping in.

For a small business owner, it’s hard to take time off when the demands of the business are all consuming. Yet we must take a break …and once a year is a minimum! We need to find ways to create balance in our lives and birthdays are a great excuse and opportunity for reflection and celebration.

A Day For Myself
I have made it an annual tradition to not work on my birthday. If my birthday falls on a weekday, I do not schedule clients or teach classes. I spend at least part of the day alone, out of doors and, if possible, out of the city. I’ll go on a hike in coastal Marin, meditate at Spirit Rock or at the Green Gulch Zen Center, or just find a way to sit still somewhere. I reflect on the past year and think about the year ahead and what is most important in my business and in my life.

Getting away from my daily routine is often how I get the chance to think creatively as a business owner. On this annual birthday “retreat” I slow down to reflect on my life, my health, my family and every blessing no matter how small. This day of contemplation with fresh air and exercise does a lot for my spirit and helps me to recharge for the year ahead.

Celebrating the Season
My dear friend Cece, who has now passed, introduced me to the idea of a “birthday season” over a decade ago. It started for her by accident. Her many friends would call to take her out for breakfast, brunch or dinner on her birthday and she would get fully booked up for the day. Then she started making plans for the day before her birthday and the day after. Finally, she announced with great joy and laughter that she was officially celebrating her birthday season, which started 10 days before the date and continued for 10 days afterwards. She invented her own way to celebrate so that she could connect individually with all the people she cared about.

I love this idea and have enjoyed extending my birthday into a “birthday season”. I have introduced this to others and have implemented the concept for family members’ and close friends’ birthdays, too.

A New Tradition
My first grandson was born a year ago and it now makes the month of October even more significant to me. I’ve decided to start a new birthday tradition—spending special one-on-one time with him. This year it may be only a swing at the park but next year he’ll be ready to run the bases!

What is your birthday tradition?

Be Here Now

BE HERE NOW. The ultimate “mantra” voiced by Dr. Richard Alpert, known to many of us as Baba Ram Dass. Ram DassLast Friday night I saw “Acid Test: The Many Incarnations of Ram Dass” at The Marsh in Berkeley. It featured Warren David Keith as the performer and was written by Lynne Kaufman. This one-man play covered three significant events in the life of Ram Dass – meeting his guru Neem Karoli Baba in India, being present at his father’s passing, and dealing with a serious and debilitating illness in these last years of his life. The performance was fun, sad and deeply effective. Now, it may have been particularly enjoyable to me because I met both Ram Dass and his guru (referred to as “the blanket Baba”) in India in the 1970’s. At the time they were funny, powerful and quite present.

In his many books and lectures Ram Dass has gifted us with his message of mindfulness. For him, it is all about being and staying in the now. It is difficult to “be here now”, though. When you think about it, it’s already behind you. When you contemplate where you want to be or what you want to do, you are beyond the present moment.

I spoke briefly with Warren David Keith after the show. He told me about performing the play for Ram Dass at his retreat in Maui. He said Ram Dass was very frail but very present. How often does someone get a chance to see their life story acted out in front of them? If we were to see our own story played out before our eyes, could we “be here now”, too?

In our own businesses we try to stay present – in front of clients, ordering inventory, hiring staff, reviewing financials. Can we assess past performance and plan for the future while also being present and aware? It may be difficult but it might help us stay focused on what is most important and run our businesses with openness and mindfulness.

If you are interested in seeing the play, it’ll be at The Marsh in San Francisco on April 12th.


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